


Verrückte Delikatessen (Sausage Party At Kling Klang)

by margaritaville_antifa



Category: Kraftwerk (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-20
Packaged: 2019-08-26 08:51:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16678447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/margaritaville_antifa/pseuds/margaritaville_antifa
Summary: Ralf wants meat.





	Verrückte Delikatessen (Sausage Party At Kling Klang)

**Author's Note:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4R82pNqGBE

Ralf needed meat. He wanted it, he craved it so much he felt like he could die. Saliva dripped from his mouth as he thought about fat, juicy sausages. He couldn’t stand it any longer, he had to get his meat. He grabbed his coat and headed out of his flat. He knew exactly where to find the best cuts of meat…

At the Kling Klang Deli, Florian was at the register, wiping down the counters while Karl cut a block of swiss cheese into slices for sandwiches. Ralf busted through the door, panting and sweating profusely.

“Hallo, Herr Hütter,” Florian said. “What can I get you?”

“Meat. I want meat.”

Florian frowed. “Uh, what kind of meat?”

“Any will do.”

“Okay… give me a second.” Florian rushed to the back kitchen where Wolfgang was preparing the meats.

“Wolf! Give me your finest salami.”

“You could’ve said please first, y’know,” Wolfgang said, as he handed one thick, long sausage to Florian.

“Danke.” Florian ran back to the front counter, the salami in hand, and showed it off to Ralf, whose eyes widened at the length of the meat.

“Can I…” Ralf stuttered. “Sample it?”

“You may.”

Ralf leaned over, staring at the wurst in amazement. Florian lightly tapped his cheek with the meat. Come on now. Are you going to try it or just look at it?”

Ralf licked his lips and slowly engulfed one end of the salami in his mouth, savoring the spices before biting a chunk off and swallowing it whole. Florian watched him intently, as he made his way down the meat stick. Karl looked on, slightly uncomfortable but intrigued. 

Ralf had made it halfway when Florian withdrew his meat. “You’ll have to pay for that now.”

“What?”

“Fifteen marks, please.” 

“Fifteen? Can’t you give me a discount?”

Florian shook his head. “Fifteen, Ralfie.”

Tears welled in Ralf’s eyes as he reached for the notes in his pockets. “And to think… we had something special, Florian… The intimacy we shared.”

Wolfgang came out, shirtless with pepperoni slices covering his nipples. “Hey, what’s all the commotion in here?”

“WOLFGANG! You’re going to get us in trouble with the health department!” Florian yelled as he chased Wolfgang back into the kitchen.

“Uh, I think it’s time for my lunch now,” Karl said. He hurried out the door, leaving Ralf alone. He slammed the DMs on the counter and walked out with the half-eaten salami.

Back home, Ralf tried to eat the rest of the meat, but it was strangely bitter tasting. The flavor and passion, gone. “I will never eat meat ever again for as long as I live,” he declared.

And then, Ralf became a vegetarian.


End file.
